The longest standing struggles of my life (my whole 31 years) have been discovering what my purpose is, understanding my passions or having a plan for my path.

I’m in a traditional job. A corporate gig. A 9-5. I chose what my college major was going to be when I was eighteen years old. And since then, I’ve been in some kind of role that reflects the application of that finance degree. If I look back on it, I have no clue what made me choose finance. Knowing I was good at math combined with an engrained belief that the traditional job path was the only way. I wasn’t born with that belief obviously, but I received plenty of conditioning to bring me to that point early on. Get good grades. Go to college. Get a degree. Get a job. Build a career. Retire at 65. All while having an underlying level of fear of failure. insert crying laughing emoji

I started with strong goals and great intentions. When asked about my career goals, I would adamantly proclaim that I wanted to become CFO of a company. No clue which company, but I knew the top tier of corporate life was something that started with a “C.” So, in my case that meant CFO. But then pretty early on in my working life, I started to feel a sense of discomfort. Something pushing back against my day to day. I started witnessing that success, reward and recognition weren’t just awarded for doing great work and adding value. They were awarded based on favoritism, gender (a post for a later day), and “playing the game.” Now, I’m a Type A, enneagram 1 and Cancer. So, following the rules, acting justly and treating people kindly and fairly quite literally drive my entire existence. Unfortunately, the same things don’t always drive Corporate America.

To combat the feelings, I’ve changed companies, relinquished expectations and come to terms with the fact that I don’t actually want to be a CFO. I’ve focused on the parts of my work life that I can control and I’ve tried to show up in a positive way for myself and for those around me. But wow does that suck the energy out of me. To be positive when I feel negative. To be happy when I feel defeated. To try to uplift and encourage others when I feel discouraged and deflated. It’s a constant battle that I’m still in the midst of, but it’s something that I want to reconcile this year. Making a big exit from Corporate America is probably not in my cards for 2025, but I can’t accept another year on the hamster wheel. I can’t just sit through more of the same while I know fully that it’s not fulfilling me, and in fact actively doing the opposite. I need to rework what my future looks like.

I was asked a few weeks ago what my career goals are. This person asked, “what are the things you want to accomplish by certain ages?” And for the first time, I was honest. I replied saying that I didn’t have any. I was no longer setting milestones for myself or telling myself that I needed to achieve certain titles, salaries or responsibilities by certain ages. I was answering as someone who has been promoted, reached salary goals and met my expectation to lead a team by thirty. But now, my sole goal is to find a way to enjoy what I do and feel like my role has a purpose that I believe in. That’s it. The only goal. The person I gave that answer to didn’t like it. They scoffed a little because they were clearly someone who has lived by a timeline no matter the consequences and they had made it far because of that. I have zero judgement for that person. But, I’m sick of the expectation that we all have a career plan.

I chose my college degree when I was eighteen. Thirteen years later, more sure of myself, confident in my interests and firm in my beliefs, I can certainly say that I would not choose the same career path if I were starting over today. I don’t have regrets and don’t feel like I missed out on something different, but why would I hold myself to a ten year plan when I know ten years ago, I didn’t want the same things I want now? Why do we still hold people to such rigid timelines? And even more so, why do we judge people if they don’t have an answer to what their five, ten and twenty year career (or life) plans are? I hope this expectation becomes outdated. I hope our society starts to align with careers that can change, evolve and flow just as we do as humans. I hope five years from now, I can look back and feel proud of the changes I made in my work life that helped me feel more fulfilled, more joyful and less burdened by the hours I spent doing the thing that made my living.

So, the next time you go to ask someone their career goals, where they see themselves in ten years or what their plan is, I challenge you to change the question. Ask them how they hope to feel, what they’re looking to get out of their work or what kind of team they want to be surrounded by! There’s more to work than a title! Here’s to changing the narrative around careers! I know I’m excited to take a different approach!